Started my first week of school today, and it is so surreal. I still do the same things I always did in Taiwan: woke up and ran in Da’an Forest Park, walked to 7-11 for my morning latte, strolled through an art gallery and picked up food at the night market; ended my night on the patio of a perfectly artsy cafe…but…I’m in college. Four hours of class, but I already recognize that, unlike the American college experience, school won’t be my life here. It’s simply another thing, amongst the many other things, that I’ll be doing.  Of course, that all may change when I start my Mandarin classes in the morning (8am-10am, Chinese learnin’) in addition to classes all afternoon, but I want to study as hard as I play.  I got so scared today as I walked up the stairs to my first class at Ming Chuan. I stopped for a minute and just thought: Stephanie, what on earth are you doing? Attending a university in Asia, and not even a good one; having your classmates either be Spanish-speaking scholarship recipients from countries with diplomatic ties to Taiwan or local girls all decked in pink bows and colorful UGG boots? (why…) Stephanie, go back to the US like a normal girl. Aren’t you tired of feeling a fresh wave of doubt everytime anyone (the taxi driver that’s taking me to SOGO, the health office worker who processes my forms, every single classmate I meet) asks why you’re here?  And on top of that, dealing with the pressure of visa applications (a horror I wouldn’t wish on anyone) + missing documents + deadlines…has been, to put it lightly, a trial.  But it’s time like these where I have to cling onto the moments that make me just stop + marvel at how ridiculously good my life is: right now, at the computer, my two cats cuddled up next to me purring; my sister sleeping beside me; the sound of cars honking out the window in the morning; the sunlight filtering through the trees when I walk down Shida Road, the comfort of my favorite cafe.  I still have no idea what I’ve done, and if it’ll all work out for the best in the end, this moving to Taiwan thing. But I sure know that I couldn’t live with myself if I didn’t try. 

Started my first week of school today, and it is so surreal. I still do the same things I always did in Taiwan: woke up and ran in Da’an Forest Park, walked to 7-11 for my morning latte, strolled through an art gallery and picked up food at the night market; ended my night on the patio of a perfectly artsy cafe…but…I’m in college. Four hours of class, but I already recognize that, unlike the American college experience, school won’t be my life here. It’s simply another thing, amongst the many other things, that I’ll be doing. 

Of course, that all may change when I start my Mandarin classes in the morning (8am-10am, Chinese learnin’) in addition to classes all afternoon, but I want to study as hard as I play. 

I got so scared today as I walked up the stairs to my first class at Ming Chuan. I stopped for a minute and just thought: Stephanie, what on earth are you doing? Attending a university in Asia, and not even a good one; having your classmates either be Spanish-speaking scholarship recipients from countries with diplomatic ties to Taiwan or local girls all decked in pink bows and colorful UGG boots? (why…)

Stephanie, go back to the US like a normal girl. Aren’t you tired of feeling a fresh wave of doubt everytime anyone (the taxi driver that’s taking me to SOGO, the health office worker who processes my forms, every single classmate I meet) asks why you’re here? 

And on top of that, dealing with the pressure of visa applications (a horror I wouldn’t wish on anyone) + missing documents + deadlines…has been, to put it lightly, a trial. 

But it’s time like these where I have to cling onto the moments that make me just stop + marvel at how ridiculously good my life is: right now, at the computer, my two cats cuddled up next to me purring; my sister sleeping beside me; the sound of cars honking out the window in the morning; the sunlight filtering through the trees when I walk down Shida Road, the comfort of my favorite cafe. 

I still have no idea what I’ve done, and if it’ll all work out for the best in the end, this moving to Taiwan thing. But I sure know that I couldn’t live with myself if I didn’t try.